PC with a TS ~ How to communicate with a Transexual politely

[(deleted)]

I am pleased you are only making one post here because untill you have grown up a bit do not tell me that i am pushing my standards onto others .Your assumptions of me are wrong and when you grow up you will find that out.
Put yourself in my place! Its the 1970s no internet no books available to a 10 year old. Yes my life has been hard but its what has made me strong and able to stand up in front of 300 police officers explaining what it is like being transexual after an attempt on my life by 2 idiots armed with large pieces of wood , i still walked out of my door the next day black and blue with bruises but knowone will ever do that to me again.

At 11 years old being born a catholic i was removed from school and denied and education because of my s----lity! Now you are lucky as that would not happen today it would not be allowed , i learned the basics of reading and writing so i read the dictionary untill i reached the letter T i then knew what was wrong with me but then realised i know what i am but what do i do now?
Nothing! just get on with it there was nothing i could do in the 70s but try to live my life as best i could .
I respect all members of any community and i would like to see a day when there is no need for a trans community "it is segregation" and its wrong and i think it actualy turns trans people again'st each other because i get on perfectly ok in "the" community .

I am no better than anyone else in this world but i use my 53 years of real life experience to help others "not push my standards on them" This world owes me nothing but i owe it to others to help when i can so they do not have to go through what i have in my life.

I come accross young trans people like you who "think" they know it all and try to teach them reality because sitting at home hideing behind a PC will get them knowhere in life , they have to walk out of that door living one life not 2 , living 2 lives just makes the so called normal people in this world think its all just fun.

I don,t know you but i will still wish you all the best with your transition but do not go thinking you can learn all of this from a book or the internet "it will not happen" you can learn Charles d---ens ect or in your case maybe Harry Potter but you will not learn how to handle 4 fully grown men wanting to attack you "i can handle them" thats how strong i am and no book on earth can teach you that .

If you make it to my age you will then and only then understand.

All the best Julia .

PS Reading the dictionary tought me how to spell Transexual "it has one S" that is the proper English way to spell it , any other spelling is not from the english language.

Now stick to your word and leave this subject alone because i realy do not have time in my life defending myself again'st children.

[1sebastian]

`All I seem to get from your posts is bitterness. Behind all these words that your trying to help others you still just seem so angry. Just because I am young doesn't mean I don't have an understanding of things. Yes I am 23 going on 24, and it is true some of us..including older individuals will hide behind their computers, or live two lives. I am not one of them, I feel being out in the world and being your true self is the only way others will begin to understand us. If we hide, we let those who think we should hide win. I live only one life, one that I am very proud of. I haven't gone into insulting anything about the way you were, till this very top comment here. But that is b/c I am hoping you'll maybe take notice of it, sometimes we don't see things the way others do. I did make a comment to your statement about "100% true transsexual" because it was rather ignorant, and the type of thing we try to fight everyday. As I said we all transition, and where we stop should be up to us. I just feel this is something as a community we should try to support. Being out in the world and having to deal with those who can't understand, or can be very forth right with how they see Transgenders and such can be difficult. But being proud, and showing that there isn't this huge gap between us. There isn't any difference, that is how we start the change. I do this everyday at my job, with my friends and family, and just in the community I live in.

And I thank you for the luck, I am going to be beginning hormone therapy near the end of Oct. I couldn't be happier about it, to finally have the outside show how I feel on the inside. I also don't think I know everything, I am always open to learning, no matter how old one can be...there is always something new to learn. ;]

[(deleted)]

`Hi Sabastian.
To start i am not bitter i am very happy with my life and i also wish you every happiness in yours .

The only bitterness (if thats how you wish to term it) is mainly from the crap i get in my inbox , i always say the one thing we all deserve is respect! my inbox is mainly full of s----l comments/remarks/sugestions ect but not much in the way of respect , my life doe's not revolve around s--.

We are all different and i always point that out! and we all have different opinions of each other and the main problem there is a lack of comunication on sites like this that leads to wrong opinions of each other as you say i am bitter! no i have found true happiness because i have found my true self.

My foundation for my comments on being 100% true transexual come from my own experiences and have also been backed up by specialists in the UK . The S-- on my birth certificate now states "female" and if there was any doubt in any experts mind that would not be allowed to happen even after the opp let alone before "as it is with myself".

I am ending this here but i am ending it with all the best wishes in the world for your future and i truely mean that because you deserve happiness just as anyone else in this world doe's , if you truely wish to know me then please contact me via email (it will make a change from the s----l crap) but if you do not want to then thats fine by me .

Take care and look after yourself and if you took any of my comments as an insult then i am truely sorry but i have had to learn to stand up for myself and beliefs and will never let anyone put me down wether it be in real life or on the internet .You have your thoughts on the subject and so do i , if everyone in the world agreed on everything then this world would be a nicer place but that will never happen so i am going to agree to disagree but with no disrespect to you or anyone.

Julia .

[edgegrain]

`Let's review - - - new guy nate eagerly posted a LOT and has the energy of a zealot. That's great - no problem, to each their own style. He is fervent.

new gal Julia (apparently in my age range!) caught a but hooked by nate's style and has been persistently ripping him a new one, so to speak. We learn a lot about the challenges Julia has grown through. Fair enough, everyone comes from somewhere.

Charming young Sebastian comes along and has some smart things to say, but is getting some snarky words from Julia.

That's the summary of what I've seen.

I heard from Nate, too. These things happen. I didn't happen to get hooked by his behaviour, but I can actually understand a how Julia did.

But Julia, please, lighten up. It isn't terribly important that you want to insist on spelling transsexual improperly (there was a period when it was done wrong, and that must be where your dictionary came from. No other use of "trans" could be replaced with "tran" as you suggest, so the proper and now accepted spelling is transsexual). Your absolutism does not speak well for you or our community, though. There are other places where I have been the one "hooked" by someone's choice of words or style, and I've learned it's best to get off that high horse before falling.

And Sebastian - you write well and clearly (with the possible exception of those temporarily charming shorthand words like "Sup..."
I'm happy for you that you get to start T soon and am glad to know of another smart young FtM.

Back to the topic, I think it was "how to talk politely to a transperson?"

Oh, the irony! But we have a fine counter-example. (That means, "not like these recent posts.")

[(deleted)]

`@edgegrain .And then you join in and pick faults with all 3 of us? Oh no not another miss perfect?.

I am not part of your community- the word Transexual is now spelt by almost everyone with two S,s and has been adopted from the USA , i was born in the UK so i am sorry for useing my own language . Do not tell me to lighten up and what doe's apparently your age range mean? don't you know how old you are? speak sense please.

All 3 of us have had our differences but we all have agreed to disagree on some points so why post what you just have? is it because you know i will respond? well heres your response.

[edgegrain]

wow, julia, no - I did not post to get a reply from you. You are simply on a rampage, and that is not the least bit interesting. I'm sorry about your difficulties, but if you just want to complain then, as they say, get in line. There are plenty of complainers ahead of you in this life.

I would like these two guys to know that you don't represent anything typical about transwomen, that we are not all hostile, judgmental, and bitter. So I summarized what I had read from y'all, then made my point. If you can't read that then I can't help you.

ta ta

[(deleted)]

`@edgegrain I refuse to respond to a person who doe's not know thier age! and someone who referes to me as "new gal" Wow! you have been on this site 38 days more than me so doe's that make you an "old gal?" .

You read between the lines and pick out pieces that suit you.

You know nothing about me and where this complain thing comes from my god you have a wierd brain , my life is good and have nothing to complain about.

You carry on if you wish but you will be talking to yourself from now on , end of topic as far as i am concerned .

[edgegrain]

`julia, you are some piece of work. A bully.
How very naff.

[(deleted)]

Cant we all just get along??? lol I have no idea what the commotion is about, Julia, we asked other people to chime in, so, I am kind of excited that other people have decided to come join our discussion, I don't know how much of the original discussion is actually being discussed, but I did find one thing in common amongst all of the posts. Like I've said tiem and time again, I am very friendly, happy, optomistic and very rarly have a negative opinion abotu anyone or anything. I think there is a differnce though about the way you say something and what was actually said. Julia, as much as I'd liek to say we earned each others friendship, with friendship come a responsibility. It is my responsibility to tell you that you need to just relax and take one persons argument with respect and then simply counter respond with a respectfull, intelligent response. The over all tone of the majority of your posts are very negative and bitter. I didnt think that eith er of the other posters disrespected you or I until you started to lash out. Just chill, relax, and coem back with a positive response while still arguing the point you wish. Its not what you are saying Julia, it's how you are saying it.

[(deleted)]

`Is everyone ok now ?

[edgegrain]

`
I'm okay, I expect Nate is okay. Bullies, sadly, usually remain bullies.
Thanks for asking.

[feedback]

Just a reminder to everyone...let's not post things that could be interpreted as 'baiting' someone.

Please take a moment to review the Posting Guidelines.

We do not want to see any personal attacks (or comments that refer to other members as 'bullies') within the forum area.

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[bk11222]

`i just joined this site. i really like it compared to some other dating sites i have been on. it has a real communal feel to it. i enjoyed the posts i read here

[bribri92]

I hate when guys ask me about whats inbetween my legs upfront its so rude and disrespectful ! And it makes them look ignorant

[teebone51]

`Hello all