The future is in your hands.

[(deleted)]

Today has been an emotional day for me as i am moving to a new county in a few days and i have tried to say all of my goodbyes to as many people as i can and this is what has led me to write this post.

Just over 4 years ago i came out as me! i destroyed the few remaining items i owned that were male related i then walked out into the big wide world as my true self , peoples first reactions were to avoid me but i kept on telling myself over and over "you will talk to me" and if they crossed the road to aviod me then i crossed the road too and eventualy it worked! people started to speak to me and get to know me and they also realised i was happy .

This month i will be 54 and i often say i will be dead soon and others think i am joking but i am not , time goe's very fast so heres a message to all of you young TGs/TSs or any younger than myself (thats got to be most of you) "do it now" you will regret it if you don't because you are the ones with the power to change peoples attitudes towards transgendered people "knowone else just you" .The media in some ways missleads others perceptions of us as it makes people think we are trying to be someone different when we are just being natural and being ourselves.

The town i live near has a population of just over 27.000 people and as far as i or anyone i know i have asked i am the only Transexual in this area "that is not true" i maybe the only one who admits it and lives my life as me but that figure of 1 in 27.000 is not correct.

There has been a few tears today but i held mine back as i refuse to cry any more because i have shed enought for more than one life time but the tears from the people who have become my friends were genuine and those were the same people who a few years ago tried to avoid me but i forced them to accept me because i was not willing to live my life in some crazy world where i could not have a normal conversation and a good laugh just like everyone else doe's .

I am so happy with my life now that it is coming to an end so just go out and be yourself because you are the future and you are the only ones who can change the way others think of us just like i have.

I proberbly have a few years of good life ahead of me but when everyone gathers at my funeral and the the vicar says "In the name of the father and of the son and into the hole she goe's" that will be it for me! i will be gone so as i said just do it! be yourself and be proud of it too because you have every right to be i know i am.

Thank you for reading this .
All the best Julia.

[curiouscollege2]

`Your post was quite inspiring. I may not have transgender issues, but I have critical problems with self esteem and body image, and you inspired me to keep on working on them, at least for another day, and until I can look in the mirror and be happy with what I see.

Best of luck with the move. Hope it goes well.

[(deleted)]

`Hey thanks for the good wishes with my move and you kind comments and welcome .

I often wonder what the world would be like with out mirrors! i hate what i see but life is for living so you just go live it and make the most of it .

You look great so your mirror is faulty .

All the best Julia x.

[curiouscollege2]

`Yeah.
I keep telling myself the mirror adds ten pounds. After all, people say that TV adds ten pounds, and I'm pretty sure there are mirrors, or used to be, in cameras and TVs, so logically, mirrors add ten pounds.

And if people tell me otherwise, well, I ingore there reality and substitute my own.

And its good to hear from someone on the site. I was looking through the list of people near me locally, and its depressing how many of them say its been more then three months.

[(deleted)]

`Hi i was thinking more about my face rather than my wieght where the mirror is concerned! People are always telling me i look good but i just say `don't lie' then do a pretend slap.

As for people on this site there are a very mixed bunch which is a bit like society but in society people interact with each other where as here there is a lack of interaction , i have tried to get these forums going but if i stop so do others or i end up getting attacked because i speak my mind when needs be and i tell it like it is but i am ok with that as i know the truth hurts some people , i don't expect everyone to agree with me as that is what discussion is about but i will not allow others to attack me for having an opinion .
The site is mainly U.S dominated and we see things differently or there is a lack of understanding of how we do things here in the UK to how things are done in the U.S so maybe thats why the USA has to be permanantly at war with other countries (Sorry USA but we are all different and you cannot force the world to change to suit you)..

Take care Julia .