What is up with being transgendered?

[(deleted)]

Hello to all,

I guess I would like to express a disapointment I have with trying to contact or be contacted by those who I have shown or share interest. I have been on this sight for close to a year now and while I have heard from some interesting people, many of the emails I write are read and unanswered. It seems, as a group, the transgendered like to get involved when the see something they don't like and stay silent to something acceptable. Sorry if I haven't found the right button to push to turn you on. Dating has never been more difficult for me than trying to just establish corespondence with someone who is mutually attractive. I hear dating or finding love is difficult for somone who has transgendered, but if it was for the best, then what is the problem? Get over it all ready.

Simply put, I am not interested in finding a warm body to sleep with me and to let me do what ever I wish at any time. Like those who I have contacted, I am looking for a "good thing" and not a flury of drama or a one night stand or worse yet, "cheep sex". I am drug free and disease free, but my inbox doesn't reflect an interest there either.

So, I ask all you sexy transgendered MTF, what's up and what's the problem with me. Is it distance? or are the transgendered so picky and friged that they can't make a decision. You are not all that if your personality is so pie in the sky you can't see the forest from the trees. Age is no excuse for being rude or stuck up. I am not uneducated about the transgender process and understanding anything isn't below me. Ok, you were a woman trapped in a man's body. You were strong enough to make the change and hopefully, the change worked out and you are passable, maybe a perfect ten, so get over it, are you happy? You say you want a hetrosexual man, but when a decent one drops out of the sky and sends you an email, you don't answer or you don't go out of your way to find one or read the profile written by one, but you demand yours to be written and claim you want the dirty minded to take a hike.

I am not perfect and I am not everyone's match, but I know who I am and I know I am a decent person, the same as you think you are. And those of you who are reading this post, you know who I am talking about and what I am talking about.

Why not open up a little. I could use a little help here. You all know the world isn't cut and dry, black and white and so on and so on. I have found those who have answered to be very positive and good people. Maybe I am not for them and they are not for me, but it seems no one is really trying here. I found few I would have really liked to discover more about, but they drop off the end of the earth. I find many who are very sexy and looking for the same thing as me, but still nothing. Why?

So, barring the crack pots that will remark with something crude to this post, what is my problem? Is it my profile? Is it something that is misunderstood? I am kinda a loner, so I don't keep up with all the lingo. I don't go to the "gay" bars. I don't know the language. I don't want to know it either. I read the profiles carefully and I know I am the sort many are looking for, so what is up with the silence?

Von

[(deleted)]

`Von,

sorry about the way sisters have been treating you. i dont have the answer why they dont return your emails but just be patient and someday somebody will be interested. or perhaps you're lookin at all the wrong places.

but just hang in there.

[beefymcmanstick]

`Von, in all honesty, I'm in no place to make any assumptions as to why you haven't gotten responses, but for what it's worth, I don't think it has anything to do with being transgendered.

Sometimes people simply would rather not respond, especially if they feel that there's no chemistry or something that doesn't need to be said. This takes nothing away from you being a good guy, you've presented yourself in a heart felt manner but what it comes down to it, that if someone is simply not interested, then they may not respond.

Also, keep in mind, that most (not all, but most) people often think to themselves, what can this person offer me? What can this person do for me and in my life? I think that, and yes, I too have found that there are a few times where someone won't respond...it's no big deal. It's better that they didn't respond now, especially if things would never go anywhere whether it be as a friend or more, than respond and find out much later on that it was a huge mistake. And that does happen, quite often.

My only bit of advice is this. You've been here one whole year, doing what you're doing with little to no luck (as you made it sound). If what you're doing hasn't worked for you, why not try doing something different?

[(deleted)]

clionicole wrote: `Von,

sorry about the way sisters have been treating you. i dont have the answer why they dont return your emails but just be patient and someday somebody will be interested. or perhaps you're lookin at all the wrong places.

but just hang in there.



Hi, thanks for the response. It was very warm and uplifting. I am seeking a quality relationship and I believe I know what I am looking for. I don't go to shady places for just that reason, because I have never found a lasting relationship from a club. Clubs are fine for fun, but the risk these days is great. It seems to me those who are serious about finding someone compatable are trying online as opposed to staying on the same course that led them to looking online in the first place. I understand it will take time and most of these relationships will include some distance, but there shouldn't be anything wrong with that aspect during the process of getting to know someone. Finding compatability isn't easy if we make it hard. Not giving someone a chance just because of some d, istance may prove to missing out on something great. I am divorced with no children and able to travel and/or relocate. However, I do like to establish a mutual honesty before investing into a relationship and it seems its difficult to get past the first step with nearly everyone I have encountered and I am just asking "Why?" Is it me, is it my age, am I ugly, is it something I said in my profile, is it where I am from? I feel I am being rejected and I am willing to do something about it, but I don't know what it is I can do except move to LA.

[(deleted)]

beefymcmanstick wrote: `Von, in all honesty, I'm in no place to make any assumptions as to why you haven't gotten responses, but for what it's worth, I don't think it has anything to do with being transgendered.

Sometimes people simply would rather not respond, especially if they feel that there's no chemistry or something that doesn't need to be said. This takes nothing away from you being a good guy, you've presented yourself in a heart felt manner but what it comes down to it, that if someone is simply not interested, then they may not respond.

Also, keep in mind, that most (not all, but most) people often think to themselves, what can this person offer me? What can this person do for me and in my life? I think that, and yes, I too have found that there are a few times where someone won't respond...it's no big deal. It's better that they didn't respond now, especially if things would never go anywhere whether it be as a friend or more, than respond and find out much later on that it was a huge mistake. And that does happen, quite often.

My only bit of advice is this. You've been here one whole year, doing what you're doing with little to no luck (as you made it sound). If what you're doing hasn't worked for you, why not try doing something different?





Hi, Thanks for your response. Its nice to hear you say you don't think it has anything to do with being transgendered. I hoped to hear just that. I can easily understand the relief the transgenderd have after comepleting most or even the entire change. Anyone should be able to understand the emotional relief and the satisfaction gained in curing the inner problem on not being able to project ourwardly who they believe they are. Trapped inside a body that is not appropriate to the spirit must be difficuilt to experience and its in that experience and having the courage to make appropriate choices that will reflect a positive change is exactly the strength in a person I am looking for in my life. I thought it was worth a chance to see if I could find someone who fits my needs. They do not necessairly have to be transgendered, but its difficult to find someone who has the qualities I am seeking who isn't already spoken for, if you know what I mean. As many put it, attraction and chemistry are important too and I don't mean to sound shallow, but I have been in love with biological women who had male charactericts either in the hands or hips or any other part, it doesn't matter. Actually, its said that the perfect woman is a man on pure estrogen. I don't know if that is true, but I have herd it in the past. I like the idea this site is free and I applaud those who have created the site, because I think it shows the diversity of the culture within the culture. So many members say they are here to experiment or looking for ----- sex, but to those transgendered who have sucessfully completed their quest are looking for the triditional relationship and there is absoutely nothing wrong with that. I thought my understanding would be enough to find someone with a mutual attraction for mind, body and spirit. I don't know. Am I ugly to those I have contacted? Being pragmatic and sharing the problem here seems to bring about a positive discussion and I think it is at least going in the right direction. Time will tell. There really are not alot of alternatives for me at my age. I do believe that older women can easily attract younger men and while older men are sometimes given credit for attracting younger women, lets not give them too much credit. I am older and since my divorce, I have only dated one woman who was younger than me. Its not that easy and I don't try to contact younger women on this site. I do like to stick around my own age and within at least fifteen years if I do look at someone younger.

I also understand about how some look to themselves and wonder what the man has to offer them. I do understand that if distance is a problem, I can't offer a whole lot, but offering a great deal even if being close by isn't the right way to start a relationship either. It might be a motivating factor, but those motives arn't genuine and I try to only answer those profiles who are asking for something real in the way of a compatable relationship. All the rest will follow if the team work is there. As long as there is a giver, there will be a taker and I am not looking for a taker and what I find in the profiles I answer, they project themselves as being fed up by others taking from them. It seems there is a mutual understanding right from the beginning, but the proof is in the pudding and with no response, I have to begin to ask some questions. I hope there are some answers, but again, maybe there isn't. Not to sound offensive, but the reason I posted this question in the fourm is to try something different. I have made a few friends, but I find the trust isn't there. And, with another, she was in love from the first email and that isn't exactly believeable either. All of them have distance involved and it isn't a probloem that can be solved in days. It takes months. I also understand that many attractive transgendered women are bombarded with email. That I can understand as well. Perhaps my email looks no different than the hundreds they get every week. I don't know.

[lisaevecali]

I've had only bad luck trying to find someone on line. I use to have a bunch of different sites hoping to find someone. I've been single for many years even though I tried like hell not to be for most of them before I gave up. I got lied to 99% of the time and everyone far away never came to visit me no mater how much time I put into getting to know them. I had many men over a few years that said I was all this and that and they would come see me soon. But no one ever did. We learn fast that its mostly just a bunch a dreamers or married guys playing a game or living out a fantasy.

Now I'm super busy in my life and I don't have time to answer every e-mail. If there is no pic and no written profile, chances I wont answer even when I do have time. If you just had the pic in the suite and tie I would think, "Here is a nice guy." But two of the others would make me not answer, I'm a bit of a prude though.

I have a blog on here somewhere called PC with a TS - How to communicate that a Transexual politely. If you cant find it here its easy to find on my myspace linked to my profile. It tells guy a lot of the dumb things they do just being guys. Many new guys have found it very helpful. By your post here it seems like you would not do the really dumb things but it wont hurt to read.

I hope you, in the end, have better luck then I did.

I broke down Sunday night and agreed to a date - my first real date in over a year and a half. He got up and left in the middle of the date when I told him I would not go home with him after dinner for ---. I ended up having to pay for a dinner I really could not afford. Dating is a nightmare for all girls but even more so for a TS.

Lisa eve

[(deleted)]

lisaevecali wrote: I've had only bad luck trying to find someone on line. I use to have a bunch of different sites hoping to find someone. I've been single for many years even though I tried like hell not to be for most of them before I gave up. I got lied to 99% of the time and everyone far away never came to visit me no mater how much time I put into getting to know them. I had many men over a few years that said I was all this and that and they would come see me soon. But no one ever did. We learn fast that its mostly just a bunch a dreamers or married guys playing a game or living out a fantasy.

Now I'm super busy in my life and I don't have time to answer every e-mail. If there is no pic and no written profile, chances I wont answer even when I do have time. If you just had the pic in the suite and tie I would think, "Here is a nice guy." But two of the others would make me not answer, I'm a bit of a prude though.

I have a blog on here somewhere called PC with a TS - How to communicate that a Transexual politely. If you cant find it here its easy to find on my myspace linked to my profile. It tells guy a lot of the dumb things they do just being guys. Many new guys have found it very helpful. By your post here it seems like you would not do the really dumb things but it wont hurt to read.

I hope you, in the end, have better luck then I did.

I broke down Sunday night and agreed to a date - my first real date in over a year and a half. He got up and left in the middle of the date when I told him I would not go home with him after dinner for ---. I ended up having to pay for a dinner I really could not afford. Dating is a nightmare for all girls but even more so for a TS.

Lisa eve





Dear Lisa eve,

I will take your constructive advice to heart and make some changes to my profile. I don't want to be one of the men you described meeting or trying to date. In my defense of my pics, I only wanted to indicate the reality of what I look like, because you wouldn't believe some of the things I have heard from women over the years such as, "I have to have a harry chest" or "I can't date someone who has better hair than I do."

I am happy you posted a response. I can't speek for the man who left you with a dinner bill, but that was rude and would not be something I would think of doing. Actually, you did the right thing. You shouldn't go home with someone for --- and if he were a respectable man, he would understand. I can see you are serious about your life and a very strong individual. You have morals and you deserve to be treated in a respectable manner. I can also understand the problems distance poses and how you can develop an attitude toward responding to someone who lives far away. I too found myself in the same situation with someone who lives in the Phillipines as much as I try to keep the relationship on a friendship basis only, she continues to describe her ever lasting love for me to the point I no longer wish to vist her. We have not even met and I don't know how to tell her that it would be difficult for me to come and visit when she describes this deep love and commitment only from pictures and email.

You may not remember, but you did answer one of my emails and we wrote back and forth twice. I found it very interesting that you are working on a book. I am working on one as well. But when I expressed my interest to move to California for my career, you mistakenly thought I was moving for you and thought I was a nut case. I can understand completey how you might have thought that way due to your past experience. There are unstable people out there. I am sure you have heard it before how attractive you are. You know as an author and from history, men will lie, cheat and steel to be with a beautiful woman. They will tell you anything you want to hear and you have to beware and be even more astute, because they don't understand beyond their own immediate needs. Personally, I have lived long enough to learn some very hard lessons.

I am serious about making a move. I am trying to gain more experience before I do so to make it a good experience. The experience I am speaking of is about my job and career. I can't make any promises to anyone, but I can assure you I am not a dreamer and I do have some clear goals I want to acheive with my career and personal life. Everything you posted kinda gets to me, because I have seen your picture when I log on and it catches my attention every time. You have very lovely and at the same time I can see the honesty in your eyes. That is attractive to me. I then click on your picture and realize we have communicated before and you kinda wrote me off as a nut. That's ok, I am not a harassing type of person or the type to flood you with non sense emails. Have you ever heard of the song, "I'm looking over a four leaf clover that I over looked before."? Well, if you want to look me over again, I won't put up an arguement.

Sincerely,

Von

[stephaniets9]

von i agree with bee on this...it has nothing to do with bein transgender and i know from experience there are people who don't have pics that i do not respond to.....and those with pics i am happy to respond to on here and say i am dating someone right now because i am okay you never know what the situation is as to why they do not respond and i am sorry that those that dont respond make you feel like this personally with me if that happened i can move on to someone else who doesnt midn talking so dont get worked up over little bull---- like o responses to emails i mean damn boy there is bigger things to worry about like economy aned how you are going to live each month i mean god can't noone really hurt me too bad since i lost my mom in feb thats why no responses to emails don't bug me and i do hope you find what u r looking for on here honey

thanks a bunch. Stephanie Michelle

[(deleted)]

`I agree with both Eve and Von seeing both their comments.
I though like Eve have to admit that the men out there who want us want us as some form of a side dish in their relationships for the kink side or they look only at our looks and determine we are what they want.
There are more transwoman who do not fit in the model type woman. Many ts are very basic. Some do not pass all the time, but have the most beautiful female spirit to them.
I have had more guys talk to me and want to date. But when it comes to the day of the date they want to start it at their place, which one knows is not a good sign or they want --- only and worse of all they do not show to pick you up after you spent the good part of the day getting ready.
If we were genetic woman I doubt that would be the way they would treat us.
I do not say all men are like this but a good portion of those who look for ts seem to fit that behavior.

[(deleted)]

biirthaz wrote: `I agree with both Eve and Von seeing both their comments.
I though like Eve have to admit that the men out there who want us want us as some form of a side dish in their relationships for the kink side or they look only at our looks and determine we are what they want.
There are more transwoman who do not fit in the model type woman. Many ts are very basic. Some do not pass all the time, but have the most beautiful female spirit to them.
I have had more guys talk to me and want to date. But when it comes to the day of the date they want to start it at their place, which one knows is not a good sign or they want --- only and worse of all they do not show to pick you up after you spent the good part of the day getting ready.
If we were genetic woman I doubt that would be the way they would treat us.
I do not say all men are like this but a good portion of those who look for ts seem to fit that behavior.



Thank you for your response and I understand what you are trying to say. There are many things I like about Lisa eve and I wrote her and told her about them. Seriously, I was attracted to her photo from the home page and I wrote her and she did respond, but there are so many cranks and guys looking for what they think a transgendered female wants or thiinks, that they lose track there is a real person, "woman" there who wants to be treated like she deserves to be treated and rewarded for those hours of fussing over herself to look her best.

When I was younger, much younger in my early twenties, I dodged a few dates. I remember hiding one day in the walk in cooler at work wheeling and dealing with my co workers not to tell her I was at work or worse yet hiding in the cooler. I went out with her once and I treated her well throughout the date, but I really wasn't interested in carying the notion of dating her any further. There was another time when I stood up a friend of a friend who then became a police officer in the small town where I lived. Needless to say, when there was a fender bender, guess who she faulted, when I wasn't my fault. She also wrote me a ticket. Believe me, guys who don't pay you the respect or the honor you deserve, reep what the sow. Someone will give it back to them someday, don't worry. As long as there is dating, there will be hard feelings and disappointments. I guess we have to do like all living creatures, like the salmon who swims upstream against all odds to get to the place where they were born in order to spawn and then die. We have to keep trying. So don't give up.

If Lisa would give me a chance, she might find out I am a pretty nice and understanding guy. I want to be happy like everyone else.

Thanks again for responding and I appreciate your support.

Von

[(deleted)]

stephaniets9 wrote: von i agree with bee on this...it has nothing to do with bein transgender and i know from experience there are people who don't have pics that i do not respond to.....and those with pics i am happy to respond to on here and say i am dating someone right now because i am okay you never know what the situation is as to why they do not respond and i am sorry that those that dont respond make you feel like this personally with me if that happened i can move on to someone else who doesnt midn talking so dont get worked up over little bull---- like o responses to emails i mean damn boy there is bigger things to worry about like economy aned how you are going to live each month i mean god can't noone really hurt me too bad since i lost my mom in feb thats why no responses to emails don't bug me and i do hope you find what u r looking for on here honey

thanks a bunch. Stephanie Michelle

I took Lisa eve's advice and I changed my picture. Thanks for your response and I hoped it didn't have anything to do with being transgendered. I guess in a perfect world, we all should be able to find what we want. Recieving the responses to my post makes me feel better and at least on a more even footing. Honestly, I thought I was doing something drastically wrong. I understand where Lisa is coming from. She has had bad luck and I think she is really cute. I guess you are lucky to be dating someone even right now when the economy is getting worse, because two people can live more economically than just one living alone. Its expensive to live alone.

I am sorry to hear about your mother. I am very close to my mother and I love her dearly. I sometimes worry about what its going to be like not being able to call her or talk to her one day and it makes me really, really sad. I can only imagine what you went through. That unconditional love we get from at least one parent is often abused in ways we don't even realize. Hearing about your loss makes me give my mom a big hug and tell her I love her.

Von

[heathergirl]

Von,

I'd like to add that "online dating" is safer for some than actually meeting a man or woman face-to-face. With the Internet, all social graces are off. No risk. No fear of rejection. And at least, if that happens, it's in private. Cheap rewards for many too. Vicarious living and fanciful dreams come true. It's like driving. A social event for everyone involved, but ultimately impersonal, until there's an accident. We really don't have to know the other driver to get where we're going. But I do hear that some couples do find each other online and are happily together. Fewer maybe than "play around" on the Net.

The other thing for me, being a MtF transsexual, is that many guys think they want to "'try" a t-girl, but when it comes down to actually going on a date, we girls not only come with ALL the risk of rejection or committment, but also with one big condition. How does he explain himself at the golf club when friends ask if he's dating, suspect that he is, and want to know who? "Yeah! I met this great girl. She's perfect for me except for this one little (or big!) thing." Now I'm talking about pre-op girls like me that can only pass 80-90% and not those girls that can go stealth. They have other concerns when dating more along the lines of "Do I tell or not?"

Bottom line. Dating is a mindfield. Being human is complicated, no matter what or who. We don't come with instruction books on how to be rational, healthy human beings with great skills and powers.

It's a lifelong learning experience. Schools not out! Who was it that said, "It is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all"?

That guy's never had a drink thrown in his face!



Heather

[(deleted)]

heathergirl wrote: Von,

I'd like to add that "online dating" is safer for some than actually meeting a man or woman face-to-face. With the Internet, all social graces are off. No risk. No fear of rejection. And at least, if that happens, it's in private. Cheap rewards for many too. Vicarious living and fanciful dreams come true. It's like driving. A social event for everyone involved, but ultimately impersonal, until there's an accident. We really don't have to know the other driver to get where we're going. But I do hear that some couples do find each other online and are happily together. Fewer maybe than "play around" on the Net.

The other thing for me, being a MtF transsexual, is that many guys think they want to "'try" a t-girl, but when it comes down to actually going on a date, we girls not only come with ALL the risk of rejection or committment, but also with one big condition. How does he explain himself at the golf club when friends ask if he's dating, suspect that he is, and want to know who? "Yeah! I met this great girl. She's perfect for me except for this one little (or big!) thing." Now I'm talking about pre-op girls like me that can only pass 80-90% and not those girls that can go stealth. They have other concerns when dating more along the lines of "Do I tell or not?"

Bottom line. Dating is a mindfield. Being human is complicated, no matter what or who. We don't come with instruction books on how to be rational, healthy human beings with great skills and powers.

It's a lifelong learning experience. Schools not out! Who was it that said, "It is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all"?

That guy's never had a drink thrown in his face!



Heather

Heather,

You have written a very heart felt response that captures the truth. I must say that your photo to me is showing a good looking gal. I find it a little comical about your discussion of being stealthed. I am going back some years, the early mid to late 80s, which doens't really seem all that long ago, but my experiences thus far with transgender encounters have been stealthed. However, while I could not tell they were transgender, the behavior gave it away dramatically, with a little help from some friends, I then was able to realize. Actually, I thought it was cute. Believe it or not...LOL...when I was younger, I had absoutely no problems dating. Older women sought after me agressively and the younger women wanted to get married and have my children. Being torn as most young men are between having uninhibited --- and starting a family, I rode the fence for quite awhile and freely dated. I had the opportunity to be picky, but I am reminded of a bar that was a disco style dance club that I frequented and I was "picked up" many times there by women that were older. Agressively, they only wanted one thing from me, to give me "oral sex", and being young and full of male hormones, I let them. However, they wouldn't let me touch their private place, except for their breasts. Now being a young man who had a steady girl friend in highschool, I simply thought it was that time of the month, because I thought I felt a thick pad there. I also thought they just didn't want to get preganant. To make a long story short, I was very satisfied and later I put two and two together with a little help from a bisexual friend who said, "I think I know who those ladies are." And a little note there, I have never had intimate relations with a man, knowing he was a man or sought that type of relationship, but some of my friends were closet homosexuals, but actively sought women at the same time.

Anyway, the point I am trying to make is that even after I was "aware", I wasn't upset and didn't get all "red neck" about what happened or tried to seek anyone out. I didn't develop a complex, get depressed or freak out thinking I commited a sin against nature. I didn't feel dooped either and I certianly wouldn't have tossed a drink in their face either. Actually, I thought the entire situation was a little comical and a little cute at the same time and I shrugged it off and I didn't judge. What I do remember is that these ladies were "FOXY LADIES" Soon after those experiences, I met my future wife and I was married for seventeen years. During those years of being married, I did think back on those encounters as the entire transgender movement begain to enter the mainstream. The drastic medical errors of the 1960s both in Canada and the United States surfaced as these poor children were born with confused ------ organs and decisions were made for them before the child displayed a tendency to be either male or female. Lives were comepletey distroyed trying to force children to live as male, when they were actually female. My heart went out to those children and as I became a medical professional myself. I vowed to myself to be open minded. ------ organs, legally define the sexes, but it doesn't define how people feel inside. I am an advocate to making good decisions. When we make a decision that is life changing, especially changing the body structure, we must be sure the change is for the best to be acceptable in society, because social health is also a very important aspect of mental health. It is very easy to become incapeable of establishing a healthy relationship. As you know, simply wanting to be a woman, but being in a remarkably male body doesn't mean the change won't cause more problems than is worth. On the other hand, some women who are biological women, look like men and they seem to have no problem becoming married and having a family. In that sense, you are right, that somewhere out there is your perfect match.

Not meaning to get so far off the subject, but I am open minded enough to know from my past experience and with having conversations with those whom I have mentioned above, they were nice people and they seemed to be good at heart. Actually, one of them phoned me several times and she just wanted to talk. She had a very good job and was very stable. She didn't want to be my one and only, but she was interested in dating and I did date her a few more times before becomming serious about my future wife. She never did let me touch her private area and I knew what was going on after only seeing her three to four times over a five month period. I finally told her I was thinking of getting married and she faded away with no problems what so ever. I thought she was a very strong individual and very secure with who she was inside and out.

Now being divorced, I am leaving the door open. I know I am not ready yet for a serious, "very serious" relationship, but I am up to meeting someone and I don't want it to happen in a bar, like I allowed to happen when I was younger. I don't want any disease and drinking and driving is way to big of a risk. Your right about the online thing being safe. its "REAL SAFE." That's why I don't get why some don't answer back. To me, age doesn't matter so much either. One day we are all going to pass away and some of us pass young and some pass old. Does it matter?

I guess I am facing a problem from being divorced and then finding myself with very few friends, because most are married or in stable relationships, and then trying to date, being older, I feel I am sterotyped in to being a dirty old man. I am finding this post was worth while and I am feeling that people do care, because sometimes it easy to start feeling they don't.

Plese don't think I am placing you in any category, I am only expressing my experiences and opinions. I don't claim to be right, just claim to try to understand and no harm can come of that.

VON

[stephaniets9]

Thanks Von. I hope you never lose your mom hun,trust me it does take a long time to deal with her death once it happens. s--- the only way I can truly deal and think about it the way i need to is when im totally alone and got some sort of rock music playing wich is normally metallica. I got that time for 2 weeks now wich i spent at my boyfriends instead of at home with my 2 roommates,since i normally are hanging out with them alot. The time i had alone at his place was when I wasnt helpgin him out and he had stuff to do. So trust me we all have our own ways of dealing that noone should try and make us deal the way they see is fit and normal because we all have our own way and our own time to deal with that. Anyway I do hope you find what you are looking for on here.

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stephaniets9 wrote: Thanks Von. I hope you never lose your mom hun,trust me it does take a long time to deal with her death once it happens. sh*t the only way I can truly deal and think about it the way i need to is when im totally alone and got some sort of rock music playing wich is normally metallica. I got that time for 2 weeks now wich i spent at my boyfriends instead of at home with my 2 roommates,since i normally are hanging out with them alot. The time i had alone at his place was when I wasnt helpgin him out and he had stuff to do. So trust me we all have our own ways of dealing that noone should try and make us deal the way they see is fit and normal because we all have our own way and our own time to deal with that. Anyway I do hope you find what you are looking for on here.



Thanks Steph, don't be a stranger.

Von