Mike and Pat

[feedback]

Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a great big smile on his face. Mike says, "Pat, what are you so happy for?!

"Well Mike, I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin' my boat, and a redhead came up to me... t--- out to here, Mike. t--- out to here!

She says, 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' I said 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Mike. I turned off the key and I said 'It's either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Mike. She couldn't swim!"

The next day Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a even bigger smile on his face.

Mike says, "What are you happy about today Pat?"


"Well Mike.... I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin' my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blond came up to me... t--- out to here, Mike. t--- out to here!


She said 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' I told her 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Mike. Way out much further than the last one. I turned off the key and I said, 'It's either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Mike! She couldn't swim!"

A couple days pass and Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat down there cryin' over a beer.

Mike says, "Pat, what are you so sad for?"


"Well Mike, I gotta tell ya.... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin' my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me...t--- WAY out to here, Mike. t--- way out to here. She says, 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' So I said, 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Mike, way WAY out...much further than the last two. I turned off the key, and looked at her t--- and said 'It's either screw or swim!'

She pulled down her pants and..... She had a -----, Mike! She had this great BIG ----- and I can't swim Mike! I can't swim!"

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[j8o0e]

`There's a guy who stumbles out of a bar and gets into his vehicle. Just his luck, a cop pulls up beside him and asks him to open the window. "Your eyes look kinda bloodshot," the cop says. "You been drinking tonight?" The guy looks at the cop and replies, "Your eyes look kind of glazed. You been eatin doughnuts?"