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![]() Posted: Post subject: Does liking a transexual make a man gay? |
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This is a video. After the video is so chat... (removed)
What a TS Woman Wants.
By- Danielle A.
(Disclaimer: This article is written about me and my experiences ONLY, it is not meant to be representative of all TS women, transgendered persons, or anyone. It is important that you get to know your particular romantic interest and ask them what they want. Some people will identify with this article, some will not.)
What a TS Woman Wants
Every TS girl is different, so I can only talk about my experiences. Being that I am highly active in the largest inter-mountain transgendered group in Utah, and write a monthly article entitled "Pride!" for the newsletter we publish, and also the fact that I am currently a pre-op TS, I think I have some valuable knowledge on the subject.
First of all, let's get a few things straight: If you are a guy who is entertaining gay or bisexual fantasies by being with a TS, then you have come to the wrong place, period. You have got to understand this: A TS girl is like any other woman on the planet. No straight woman wants a gay guy and no bisexual woman wants a gay guy who thinks of her as a guy. A bisexual woman wants another woman or straight man. A straight woman wants a straight guy. She may date or marry a bisexual guy, but obviously he won't be fulfilling his fantasies with her, as she is not a guy.
So, if you look at a TS woman as being a "-------" (horribly offensive term), or a woman with "something extra," then you have completely missed the fact that a TS woman is NOT male in any way, form, etc. Yes, that is what I said.
What? you say. But a woman doesn't have a -----, does she? YES! We sometimes are born that way, but all are still women. Let's examine a few things: What makes you a woman or a man? Is it your genitals? If you are a guy and your ----- is cut off tomorrow, would you all of a sudden become a female? NO! Look at what happened to John Bobbitt, who had his ----- cut off. Did he become a woman all of a sudden until it was reattached? NO!
The fact is, gender identity comes from the brain, not the genitals. We all start off as female in the mother and some will turn into males. But every so often, what happens is that the brain stays female-identified and yet the body turns into male, or even ambiguous, as in the case of the intersexed, those born with both genitals. In some other cases, the body turns female while the brain stays male.
My brain, my identification is all female. My body is rather ambiguous, looking much more female than male. Because of this, I personally hate the fact I have a -----. I grew up showering in the dark so I wouldn't have to see it. I sit down to pee, and I have thrown up at the sight of it. I am all female, guys, and so are the other TS's I know.
A transvestite is different: That is a guy who gets his kicks dressing as a chick. He doesn't identify as a female, he identifies as male. These are usually the ones you see in ---- movies, the ones that are called "--------."
I however, identify as female, not male. I consider myself simply as a woman in need of cosmetic surgery, not much different from any other woman.
In fact, I don't even think of myself as "TS." I am just a woman, period. I use the term "TS" because it is what others understand.
A TS woman is NOT a gay guy! That is, however, sometimes rarely true for TV's and CD's, (majority are straight), but that is NOT TS. TS's are not homosexuals, and that is a medical fact. If a TS were gay, she would be attracted to women, and be a lesbian. Anytime she is attracted to guys, she is straight.
So, if a gay guy wants me, then he has just insulted me greatly. If a bisexual man wants me, then he has also just insulted me, if he is in fact seeing me as the male part to his attraction. It means he doesn't see me as the woman I am, he sees me as something else. To understand us, you simply have to ask yourself: What would any other woman think of this? Can you imagine climbing into bed with a woman and telling her you are into her because she looks like a guy? She would slap you so hard it would make your head spin.
Now, if a guy who is open-minded, and has what I call "vision to see the future surgeries," can see me simply as a woman, and not "someone with something extra," then he has made the first and greatest step towards getting to know me. After all, you fall in love with a person's BRAIN, not their BODY. Falling for the body only is ----, which easily assumes the disguise of love. Don't be fooled, and don't try to fool your TS girl, as she will figure you out quicker than you can say "but baby...."
Now, let's talk s--. This doesn't hold true for every TS woman in the world, as women are as different from each other mentally and emotionally as are men. Within the genders you have such a wide variety of people. Within men you have the Arnold Schwarzenegger types, and also the effeminate gay guy. But they are all men. Within the women you have the hardcore biker chick who drinks beer and shoots pool, and the ultra-feminine Liz Taylor type; all women. TS women are the same: We are as different as night and day from each other. Understand that first.
When it comes to me, you will never touch my -----. If you do you will make me cry and I will lose the mood. I hate that damn thing, it is a horrible thing to have to live with, being a woman with this "thing." Being with me se---lly means that I will enjoy pleasing you and watching you being pleased with my actions. It gives me pleasure to see you enjoying me; the greatest joy when you are experiencing me, feeling me, seeing me as the person I truly am: Just a chick. I will get my ------ic pleasure later after the surgery.
So, once again you see that if you are entertaining some "gay" fantasy you will be sorely disappointed with me in bed. If you are a straight guy, you will be quite pleased to discover I am gentle, beautiful, and move like any other woman se---lly. Now, I know that holds true for many, many pre-op TS's. I have heard it several times. A post-op TS woman has her vagina, and if you get s----l with her, you may find in many instances that it takes some extra effort to bring her to ------. She may like an extended time period of lovemaking to reach her climax. This has to do with her surgery. Not all TS women are that way, of course, so you must learn your woman's wants and needs.
The problem between the sexes is that men often (not always, dears, k objectify women and thru these masturbatory fantasies they lose their empathy. They never have realistic fantasies. Their fantasies are this "perfect" type of world. There are no odors, feelings, awkwardness, nothing involved but this "perfect" type of s--. They entertain these fantasies and then someday, they might try to make them a reality. What they often find, however, is that no one wants to just jump in bed with them like they do in their fantasies; and that feelings arise and hearts get broken.
Men often think that because they think this stuff, and because they feel that way, that women must think that way too. WRONG! Women usually think very, very differently from men.
Women often fantasize about their "Prince Charming," the one guy who is sweet and strong, who sweeps them off their feet. We can sometimes ------ thinking about being loved and appreciated. In fact, some ONLY ------ that way!
And so the battle begins for understanding between the two genders. Men who have been married and been in love for a long time are usually much more understanding and gentle people than the single guy. This is from their interaction with a woman who teaches them how to "feel" more deeply.
So, if you are a guy and, naturally, quite h*
y a lot of the time, and you think by coming here to TSGIRLFRIEND.COM that you will find some wild chicks who just "want it bad," and are all on drugs and crazy, well, you have made a huge error. Watched too many ---- movies, masturbated one too many times.
Here on this site what you will find is lots of decent, gentle women, many with careers and high IQs. You won't find wild chicks on drugs and there are no orgies happening, anywhere. We talk about everyday things like other women do: Shopping, clothes, life, relationships, chocolate, and other subjects, of course.
Obviously, seeing a pre-op TS woman as something attractive physically to a straight guy takes a very open mind and a empathetic heart. We understand that. But, you have to look at a person's mindset: because that is where any real relationship is formed. You don't marry a "body," and if you do, you will soon learn that it is a shallow, meaningless existence bringing no real fulfillment. The emotional/mental connection is what forms a true bond that can weather any storm. Looks fade, people, looks fade.
On the upside, you will many times find that a TS woman is a bit more "appreciative" of being able to live their life as they feel it. This oftentimes makes for a woman who really LOVES being a woman, and is many times more feminine than the average woman. (Again, people, there is ALWAYS the exception to the rule We are not often burnt out on wearing skirts or heels, and many enjoy doing makeup daily. It is for the reason that many of us were denied the chance to do it when younger, and so now that we can, we go all out and really love being ourselves! As for me, I have the very feminine, soft voice, and a very feminine walk. I do my makeup everyday except Sunday, which is my pampering time for doing my facials and nails, etc. I dress very nice, every day. Everywhere I go with you, people will only see me as the woman I am.
If you have the right mindset you can find the woman of your dreams here at the site, but you can't do it by coming in and being a jerk.
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Response to quesions that were asked.
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Category: Blogging
To add on to the transexual question below... It does'nt mean you're strait if you like p*ssy. That p*ssy can just as easliy be made into a d*ck... What is a women? What is it all about? Men that "used" to be "women" everyone says how much of a girl they are, though they've transistioned. We;; are those men, what a women is? Or why is it that when you have S-- with a guy that has a p*ssy, that man's called gay? Maybe that's because having a p*ssy does'nt make you a girl. Liking one does'nt make you strait. Girls and guys don't just have one body part. Liking guys of any sort, you're gay. Liking girls of any sort. You're strait. Like a TS does'nt make you gay. Gay men want to have S-- with all men, not 1% of one. Strait men like the out come of a female. Like any other person, if he takes intrest in that girl. they end up having s--. There is so much more to s----lity! s----l oriendation, s----l identity... none determine the other, and each if for yourself to decide. not anyone else. No one else can tell u that u are strait! No one else can tell u ur gay. only YOU know that answer!
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A transexual is not a woman with a -----...they are Men with t*ts...it would be different if you were a woman and got surgery to get a -----..then you are a woman with a -----. but if you were born male then you are a man with t*ts....even if a transexual died in a fire and they only had the skull to identify! they would determine the body to be male!! so your born male and you die male....
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What's this now, gender is about skull size? When's the last time you measured your skull?
Men and women are social categories. Think about it, when you see someone on the street and determine their gender, you don't look at their genitals, you don't test their chromosones, you don't measure their skull. If someone changes the things that you make that determination on, and you see them as another gender, for all intensive purposes they are that gender.
PS hormones can change bone size over time
BeautiifulBytch: can we also not that, a d*ck, just like a vaginia is a s----l body part, that is always hidden. A lot of strait guys, like the way there own d*ck looks, and may find them hot, just not on guys. Which brings up a TS, if they only like TS and girls, I don't consideer them "gay" nore do I consider them "bisexual" It's a body part, there's a lot you can do with it, it's hidden, and rare for a girl to have a d*ck. That's why most strait guys like it on women. Not to mention that a d*ck and a vaginia is basiclly the same thing, one's just inside...
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Thursday, October 30, 2008
Does it make a man gay, if he dates a transexual. A professional wrote this,
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Category: Blogging
The short answer is NO. Let me explain why men who date transsexuals are not gay. Firstly, it needs to be known that every man has their own likes and dislikes in terms of s----lity and emotional companionship. Many "straight" men are not as straight as they say they are, but that doesn't necessarily make them gay or bisexual. Just because society likes to label people with straight, gay or bisexual doesn't mean everyone fits into those categories. In the Transgender Dating world those terms don't always match up to reality.
Additonally, transgenderism has nothing to do with s----l orientation.
A lot of men will seek out transsexuals for dating and love because they feel that transsexuals are actually more feminine than genetic women. Yes, that is right....MORE feminine! Additionally, men find that genetic women have a lot of hangups in the bedroom department that they feel transsexuals do not have. While that may be true to some extent, it's not a hard and fast rule to live by. Transsexuals who were born in a male body, but have female brain chemistry and are truly women stuck in a man's body until they begin transitioning into a female outer appearance. However, it must be known that nobody should be judged solely on their outward appearance as their are many complicated circumstances that hinder the transitioning process, most of which come from society and financial barriers.
Everyone has a right to date whomever they want to without judgment, however that is just not where society or reality is at these days so I cannot stress enough the importance of living your life in a way that makes YOU happy without worrying about what your friends or neighbors will think.
While some men who date transsexuals may be bisexual, those men who are gay would not be in the slightest interested in dating someone who is NOT actually a man, but a transsexual who embodies everything that is beautiful in a woman.
It is also important to point out that not all transsexual male to female play an active role se---lly with their male genitalia. In fact, many transsexuals do plan to have complete SRS (sexual reassignment surgery) at some point in their lives. Men should not approach transsexuals with the expectation that they will always have another ----- in the relationship. Transsexuality is not a s----l fetish, but a gendor dismorphic disorder that stems from before birth. That is not to say that being transgender is a "bad" thing or mental illness, it simply is a fact of life which has not yet been fully embraced by most civilized countries.
In closing I applaud those men who are not afraid to say they prefer to date transsexuals and do not worry about what society will think. But please be aware that the greatest sacrifice is made by those who are transgendered and have to struggle with the constant abuse that society and ignorant men prey upon them.
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RE: Does liking a TS make a man gay?Today at 1:46AM
beautiifulbytch
beautiifulbytch
Joined: 10/30/2007
Posts: 7
If I also may add, guys like TS because they want a new experience.. But are not attracted to men...
RE: Does liking a TS make a man gay?Today at 2:04AM
beautiifulbytch
beautiifulbytch
Joined: 10/30/2007
Posts: 7
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stevopants
stevopants
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`When I first started seeing my ex-girlfriend (the first transgirl I dated), she asked why I was interested in transgirls in the first place. To me, I'm attracted to feminine beauty. Period. I don't see guys as being attractive, I'm physically attracted to girls hair, their eyes, lips, cheeks, body, etc. When it comes to transgirls, for me it's a sense of "Wow, this girl knows that she's a girl no matter what equipment she was born with. It takes a lot of style, skill and bravery to become the person she knows she is" and to ME, that's the sexiest thing of all.
So many people just go through life and just don't work on becoming who they're destined to be, and it pisses me off. You girls KNOW who you are and you've had to go through some serious s--- to do it. You give yourself a beauty and an individuality that genetic girls sometimes take for granted, you know?
I date genetic girls AND transgirls because, I see the same thing.
That being said, there's something about being with a transgirl that's more...familiar, as it were.
I DO NOT WANT TO COME OFF AS CRASS OR DISRESPECTFUL, I'M JUST LAYING IT OUT HERE.
I've been with a transgirl who absolutely refused for me to see her without her underwear on, and that's even how we had sex, and I totally respected that.
I've Also been with a transgirl who had no intention of having the SRS because she always hated Any Kind of surgery and she wasn't going to let her ----- stop her from being a girl.
Now for me, I was more comfortable with the latter because it didn't feel so restrictive. I didn't care that she hadn't fully transitioned, I wanted to be with HER, not just her genitals. With the latter I got to experience something which I normally wouldn't have being heterosexual, and it was like "Oh! I'm familiar with what feels good for me, and it's not like to me she's not a girl, and this will make her feel good!"
I felt more comfortable because I felt like I knew what I was doing, if that makes any sense.
Back to the first conversation I had with my ex (We're still on really good terms, btw). When we got to the topic of what we were going to do, and how we were going to do it, she said "Oh, you're a KINSEY 2, maybe 3" and she then went into the whole thing about how some people believe that everybody's "bi" to some degree, and it's just a matter of being comfortable.
That was good enough for me.
So I guess what I'm trying to say ladies is that if a guy's sincere, and you trust him, and you like him enough to want to engage in s----l acts, and he's trying to go for your -----, it's not because he's Gay, it could just be that he wants you to enjoy it in the same way he does. There are a lot of straight guys who use prostate massagers or an*l toys, but that doesn't mean they're gay either.
The important thing is to talk about this stuff before it all goes down in a way that you both feel comfortable with.
Knee-jerk reactions just make everybody feel uncomfortable.
You want a guy to be open-minded enough to be interested and attracted to you despite not being born a certain gender, the least you could do is be open-minded enough to not label him as gay just because he wants to make you feel good too, you know?
Much love & respect all around.
-Stevo
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