How To Ask A Girl For A Date

[alaenagirl]

Im starting this thread, because i noticed that the fellows are wondering scam a date with us and what it takes...

Of course all are welcome here to submit their opinions...

First of all i would like to start by complimenting the people here on transpassion, you have been very tolerent and patient of us. and i like the comments and letters you have submitted. its nice to have an oprtunity to meet so many folks.

Any statement i make starting here does not reflect anyone particular here. these are simply my experiences i have encountered since i started my transistion - and i hope it helps you all...

THIS IS WHAT I DONT LIKE - when i goto my profile email box, and i get plenty of these type, you know the ones that indicate that they have something to show me - thinking that me seeing their ----- is a turn on for me, geuss what its not and when i get one, i delete their email and never open another email from them again, another thing that turns me off is those stupid questions, i think we ladies know what im talking about.

another experience which i face, if not daily at least weekly, is when i step out my front door it seems fellows that hit on me, only seem to be into the sex, thinking that im a walking ---- doll. sometimes i fall for it and sometimes they are so obviouse that its almost insulting. the funny thing is most of them wanted to try a tg gurl for their first time, with full intension of never coming back or they just dont want anyone to know about us. if this happened to you on a regular basis, wouldnt you be a little gun shy too.

and lets not forget the pressures we get for just being transgendered, and trying to earn a living.

WHAT I DO LIKE- is when a man treats me like a lady. i may of been born male, but i am totally female minded, but when a man treats me like a lady, it makes me feel good about myself. and thats important.

i like it when a man approaches me and starts a conversation thats not -------- oriented, but rather talks to me like a person.

its not that im against talking about sex, because i love to talk about sex, as long as its not the whole conversation. and to make love to me, you better be prepared to hold me and whisper sweet nothings into my ear, and show me what its all about - the love...

WHAT I LOOK FOR IN A GUY - i get asked that a lot, what do i look for in a guy - well im not into someone because they are rich or because they are handsome or pretty, but im more about character. you can be totally broke, very ugly and you would stand a better chance with me simply because your a good person and treat me with respect.

so fellows you need to understand, its hard for us/me to let someone in our lives, because we/i are afraid of disappointing you and/or being disappointed - but be sincere, be honest and up front about your feelings, show plenty of patient and you just might find that special lady...

As for myself these are my opinions only... you can disagree or agree with me, its ok, becauswe we all are different and have different opinions.

Love You All - Alaena

[kimphne]

`Thanks Alaena,

I agree with a lot of what you have written. Transsexual/transgendered women are even more -------- objectified than ordinary women.

A couple of things I'd like to add. I find that most of the men attracted to ts/tg women that I've encountered assume/expect that preoperative women are/should be overjoyed to have a ----- and don't want their (the man's) pleasure dampened by "preop angst"; something akin to the myth of the "happy hooker".

Another assumption widely held by men and women within the mainstream community is that it's perfectly acceptable to ask a ts/tg woman - who is a complete stranger - the most personal questions including, "Have you had a --- change?", and candidly enquire about her --- life.

[libra4love89]

`Alaena and Kimphne I agree with you both 100%.I think all of us pre-op transgendered woman are seen by men as "sex objects"and that we can fullfill a fantasy of theirs.It really bothers the hell outta me when a guy that I am interested in is interested in me just for the --- or the fact I am"best of both worlds"(probably the one line that I HATE hearing!!!".And that is one of my biggest frustrations now with men is because it seems that is the only real men I have met,to me it's like please see me for the woman I am not for what I am and that was the message I was trying to convey in a poem I wrote.Now I have met other men who weren't like that and I actually enjoyed talking to them,and I definitely like it when the man doesn't talk about --- 99.99999% of the time we are talking.And fortunatly I have found someone who is like that,he is a real sweet guy and quite honestly --- hasn't been brought up but once,and that was a very short conversation compared to others...

And what I have always looked for in a man,has always been their personality,their character,how well we "click",how he respects me as a woman and how he repects my family,not how attractive he is,or what he drives,or what he makes.

So those are my point of views/opinions,hope everyone has a great day!