Why do we dress?

[feedback]

We would like to point out that this thread 'Why do we dress?' is in the Category 'CrossDressing'...so it seems pretty obvious to us that the creator of this thread was opening up a dialogue on why Crossdressers like to dress in the clothing of the opposite gender.

We HIGHLY DISCOURAGE personal attacts within the forum, especially posts that comment negatively on another member's looks and/or their grammar.

Whether or not a CD is pretty is in the eye of the beholder, and really, unless someone asks for another's opinion of their looks, is it really appropriate for comments that might make someone feel self-conscious?

In this situation, comments are made indicating that a CD member is too hairy.

Well, isn't it possible that they are just fine with exactly how they look when they crossdress...or that it is more about how it makes them feel (than whether or not they can actually achieve any realistic representation of the opposite gender)?

This site is somewhat unique in that we are EQUALLY OPEN to all elements of the 'Trans' community...and for us that includes FTM's, MTF's, CD's, Admirers...and anyone else that feels they are a part of this community.

We hope that the forum will be seen as a safe and inviting area for people to express themselves freely, without fear of negative comments directed at them (...especially when they are commenting in the appropriate section of the forum, and answering a specific question...and in a rather sweet way).

Basically, while everyone is allowed to have an off day, we hope that in the future, everyone posting in the forum will pause and ask themselves how they would feel if what they are about to post was being directed at themselves.

Thanks,



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[(deleted)]

`Feedback! I will delete the post i made! it may have seemed a personal attack on one person but it was not only aimed at one person.

I have done a lot of work to raise awareness by putting myself in the media wether that be in paper form or with the police or you can even read articals online about my life.

Recently in a BBC interview i was doing from a studio live i had a person who phoned in claiming to be from a transgender group who completely wrote off in one sentence the reason i was there! his sentence was " when a person decides to be trans".
I had spent over 20 minutes explaining to over 150.000 people how hard it is for people to come to terms with thier ------ity after losing thier friends family ect then having to face up to the reality that they were alone , i was telling them they were not alone it just feels like it and things will get better . I do not think as that person said that anyone wakes up one day and decides to be trans because you either are or are not simple as! but that one person caused by that stupid comment me to have to go back and do the whole interview again because of the backlash from the public.

Last year in the UK 93 (known) teenage transgendered people between the ages of 14 to 19 commited suicide because of the way they were treated by the public! a public who get the wrong ideas of what it is like living in the wrong body , they get ideas that we do it for fun and they get those ideas from people who do do it for fun or for ------ pleasure who have no idea what the real world is like because they do it behind closed doors.

I personaly think thats where they should stay because those are the people indirectly responsible for those teenage deaths .

Am i sorry? yes i am sorry but more sorry for the young people who died and will continue to die. I likened it to a plane crash to get the attention of the media because if it was a plane crash it would be on the front page of the papers but they got my ugly mug there on the front page instead telling them about it.

I know trans websites have to cater for all types of people i am not stupid (and i think you know that) but i think of the people who are desperate to find help! just like i was 4 or 5 years ago sleeping with a razor blade at the side of my bed , but i am still here and i think there is a reason i am still here and that is to help others . You may not think my comments were a help to anyone but believe me anyone looking in from the outside would have learned from them . I do not hate or dislike anyone as a person but i do hate the misconceptions some cause especialy when peoples lives are lost through a lack of understanding and it is that understanding that i will carry on trying to teach untill i die.

Julia.

[cdkaleigh]

`i dress because it feel good and ssooo right! Dressing in secret for almost 25 years and losing a wife because of her inability to accept me has not changed my outlook on dressing, have loved it still love and will always love it. I am beginning to understand that if people can't accept me for who I am then I don't need them in my life. I may lose friends and family, but I stand to gain so much more, being who I am. After purging when my wife left, I am beginning again to buy panties and bras and following the same path will soon start getting other clothes as well. I hope my current GF will understand when she finds out my feelings (she already knows I like wearing panties and that I used to CD)!!

[(deleted)]

`I've not dressed in a while, but I'd like to start again.

To me, it's the state of mind I enjoy. I like the role reversal aspect of dressing. I'm bisexual and submissive by nature. I like to be taken...romantically. Dressing helps to reinforce that, but it's not necessary. If I was to prioritize what makes me feel fem, I would say:

#1) Body shaving. Yep....shave it all! Arm pits, chest, legs and groin. Even the pubes! I LOVE being a smoothie. It's sexy and makes me feel fem when sleeping nakie at nights.

#2) Fitness. I know I'm going to sound like a jerk when I say this, but having a nice fit body goes a long way. I love everyone. I openly chat and makes friends with anyone no matter the gender, orientation, race, age or body type. But when it comes to attraction, I like slender fit bodies. Not muscle hard bodies, just ones that are not overweight. Saying that, it's very important for me to look that way too. I love it when I can look in the mirror and see a slender smooth body with a nice curve around my ass. I know...it's vain....haha....maybe being vain makes me feel more like a woman

#3) Finally....the clothes. Undies, nighties and lingerie. They're like icing on the cake. Even with a slender smooth body. I'm still male. Choice lingerie can be fun. I've yet to dress again. Someday, I'd love to find a playmate to share this interest with. If it's just me, I really don't need it. 1&2 satisfy my feminine side. Given the choice, it's just as enjoyable to go nude. But no denying, dressing can be fun.

#4) Makeup/Accessories. I'm not big into this. I'm a plain and down to earth person. I love how makeup and jewelry look on other people, but never liked it on myself. Then again, I don't have body piecing or tattoos either. Sometimes you just like the look on other people. I see myself as a plain person. As a girl, I'd be a tom boy....errrr.....girl....oh whatever.

[(deleted)]

`I love getting,my Gurl on" Yummy"

[daphneb]

`I love dressing even though only in private because exploring me fem side just feels so wonderful and i feel so much more alive and sexy when i do it, it just feels so amazing to feel so fem and free ,. i love being a man but ii LOVE my fem time, being gurlie is just so amazing

[(deleted)]

`I dress for several reasons, so far as i can tell. At the core, dressing lets me be what i can't be in normal life. I want to feel pretty and desired; as a man i'm ignored and uninteresting to women, but i get an incredible thrill when guys flirt with me when i'm dressed. You could say it's one of the ways i found to cope with being bisexual. Thanks to a particularly conservative upbringing, i only feel comfortable with a guy when i'm a girl. Also, when i dress, i let out the side of me that i repress most of the time; the outgoing, adventurous, playful, and dangerous side; i'm a good boy and a bad, bad girl.

[godzillaeyes1]

leahky wrote: `I dress for several reasons, so far as i can tell. At the core, dressing lets me be what i can't be in normal life. I want to feel pretty and desired; as a man i'm ignored and uninteresting to women, but i get an incredible thrill when guys flirt with me when i'm dressed. You could say it's one of the ways i found to cope with being bisexual. Thanks to a particularly conservative upbringing, i only feel comfortable with a guy when i'm a girl. Also, when i dress, i let out the side of me that i repress most of the time; the outgoing, adventurous, playful, and dangerous side; i'm a good boy and a bad, bad girl.



Do you ever get attention from women when you crossdress? I'll even ask do you get even more attention than normal from women in comparison to being dressed as a man.

[kare4all]

There are volumes of reasons why, but it does all come down the the wonderful feelings preparing to dress and feeling attractive.

[(deleted)]

`i am a closet dresser and i like to dress because i like to dress sexy and i like the looks and how i feel when dressed.. i want to meet someone that can appreciate both sides of me so i can dress for that person.

[(deleted)]

"Why" implies answers, explanations, reason. Being reasonable. Logical. For me this was just a fine way to argue with myself. The "should nots" and "could nots" were implicit. Though I can't imagine being a different normal, this isn't the one I would have chosen.
There is however a "how" that is an answer to why do I cross dress. It was all the fault of ten days of too much August heat (Seattle 2012). I'd known that I felt much more cool and comfortable with closely trimmed pubic hair. It didn't take me long to feel that trimming with scissors was an inherently dangerous procedure. Showering with gel and a new razor made me much less nervous. Razors are an all or nothing kind of thing but it seemed to work well enough.
That August instead of rinsing the shaving cream that I'd inadvertently dribbled on to one thigh, I used the razor that I'd finished using and just hadn't set down. I just didn't look right having razor's width swath of smooth skin high up on one thigh. After taking 10 seconds to thoroughly understand the aesthetic issues and implications I decided I couldn't abide such asymmetry.
Half an hour later with skin toweled off and my longer than shoulder length auburn hair still dripping wet I was thoroughly distracted by running my hands over my smoothly shaved legs. Divorced and adjusting to a long term (permanent really) state of disability adjusted income (which SSI decided means 60% of the official poverty line and allowed to earn $20/month without [before] penalties reduce the $710/month that your worth)
--Note; poverty is an issue for the people of trans. Twice as many live in poverty (relative to the not-trans), median incomes are significantly lower. Though this is balanced out by larger shares of loneliness and suicide than the general population. Statistically significant figures.
Back to the important stuff--the touch and feel of my smooth legs was becoming sublime, -------, sexy. Wait, sexy? Where did sexy come from...oh, there. Paused there, asked myself. "If you could imagine having any kind of --- which would you choose?" Without pause, without thinking and not properly edited I went on to say "...to be just-like-a-girl with a guy". (A guy who desired me like this even more than I was finding my own.)
My just-like-a-girl was not exclusive. Found that I wanted flowers, that my emotions, sense of intimacy, the way I redefined what was attractive (did I like him), and discovering what it was to worry over being attractive. Couldn't believe that my on line almost (first) boyfriend (who was reluctant to meet off line) could break things off and leave me in tears. Even though I told myself I wasn't going to cry.
That's why.

[61plymouth]

I love to dress up as a woman, and go out in public and shop as a woman for several reasons. First, my Mom put lipstick on me for Halloween in 2nd grade. Second, my Mom and wife were always asking me to carry their purse to them, if they didn't feel like getting it themselves. Third, I was always the friendliest guy in the office, so when the secretary was away from the phone, they always asked me to play secretary. Fourth, the girls I was always attracted to in my dating years always wore a lot of make-up - one girl always wore glossy red nail polish; another used to get her lipstick all over everything her lips touched; I also felt the hottest looking girls wore a lot of dark eye make-up. Fifth, in my dating years, the girls I'd kiss would get their lipstick on my lips; sometimes I'd be out in public for several hours, unaware of it. Sixth, women's clothes are more fun, more exciting, more flashy, but also more relaxing than men's clothes, and we men rely on our eyes and what we see more so than women. Seventh, I once had a dream that I was stuck in the biggest local mall dressed as a woman, and I was stuck in there in front of everybody, and I didn't know what to do - however, the feelings of helpless shame and embarrassment were so arousing , that I dared myself to do that for real someday, which I did for real, and repeatedly. Eighth, over the years, I've developed this picture in my mind of what the ideal woman would look like. I've seen very few of them, let alone had a chance to date one, but since we men are visually oriented, I just had to create her a few times - guess who I used as a canvass? (Me.) Ninth, I grew up in a family of all men, except for Mom, and she didn't wear much make-up at all, so in my early years I was uncomfortable with women who plastered their eyes and lids with tons of make-up, but when I saw that the fun vivacious girls did it, I acquired an appreciation for it - when you think about it so much, eventually you say, "I wonder what it'd be like to plaster my eyes and lids with shiny, bold-colored cream eye-shadow, lots of mascara, and lots of eyeliner?" Tenth, since I'm a part-time actor, I have to be able to handle anything, so I thought why not cover my masculinity with the most feminine of make-up, clothes, and jewelry, go out in and shop in public as a woman, and see what happens. Eleventh, dressing up as a woman is a way to temporarily escape all the rough-tough responsibilities that come with being a real man - I found it's very relaxing, too. Twelfth, I always wondered if being a beautiful Saturday Afternoon Mall Rat Woman was all it's cooked up to be, so I tried it, to see what it felt like to be a woman - it's a lot of hard work putting all that make-up and nail polish on, but it really does feel good, especially once you see your reflection in the mall's glass and mirrors, of you carrying a purse and shopping bags, wearing all that make-up, and looking very pretty.[/b]

Jennifer Dornmeier (61 Plymouth)

[(deleted)]

Aisde from the ------ partsand how it makes me feel.... Because I'm young and skinny, why not take advantage of it right? While I still can right? Don't wanna look back and regret I didnt do it..

Young, dumb, and full of cressdressing.

[(deleted)]

Aisde from the ------ partsand how it makes me feel.... Because I'm young and skinny, why not take advantage of it right? While I still can right? Don't wanna look back and regret I didnt do it..

Young, dumb, and full of cressdressing.

[(deleted)]

There isn't a 'why' for me. I don't expect to find a sensible, rational answer that would explain my self to me. Maybe just because it is the only way to get from now to the time when a guy brings me flowers. Tells me I'm pretty. And how else would I be likely (possibly) feel myself held close and find him fumbling with zippers, strange clasps, very tight panties...And even alone, it is a fine, ------- delight to move, walk, skip, lean, pause. If I only knew how lonely it would be, I might have cleaved tighter to denial.